Note: This post was originally published here. But after three and a half years of blogging, it still holds true. 

The title of this one is actually a little misleading, because the answer is that it’s almost impossible.  At least for me it is.  But after almost 18 months of blogging, I feel that my skin has grown thicker and I can finally share a little insight.

Millions of people blog about a lot of different things, and like many others, my blog is very personal to me.  You see, I’m not just sharing pictures with you of what someone else did.  I’m sharing our home.  The home that we’ve planned for and worked on for almost 2 years now. Our forever home. The home we will one day raise our children in and grow old together in. So to me, it’s personal.

For every activity I blog about, there are about 100 that I don’t, so how can anyone else know what’s best, or even know the whole story?!  Who are they to judge?! When I read things like “your furniture is ugly” or “that looks terrible” or “you should just completely start over here,” I can’t help but get a little bent out of shape.  Because you’re not just talking about a piece that I picked out. You’re talking about a decision I made for my home, which is incredibly personal.

But to be honest, “it’s personal” is a cop out.  If you make the decision to make certain aspects of your life public, then you have to accept the consequences of that decision.  Not everyone likes what we do with our house.  Not everyone agrees with my opinions.  And that’s ok.  The beauty of blogging is that if you don’t like one blog, there are literally millions of others to choose from.  In short, the solution: if you don’t like it, don’t read it.

And so, here are the things that I’ve learned over the past year and a half.

1. Look for the positives.  I did a survey a few months back to gauge what my readers thought about certain aspects of the blog.  I got back some feedback that made me feel pretty awesome actually.  I’m still quite the newby at this blogging thing, but the encouragement gave me much more confidence.  But then there was one very negative comment.  At first, I was upset (ok, I cried) and wondered why someone would say such mean things.  Why was it that all of the positive feedback seemed to bounce right off me and the one negative comment was what stuck? But now, looking back, I am so appreciative to whoever made that comment, even if they did hide behind a keyboard to say it.  I probably would not have worded the comment the way that this anonymous person did, but the points were actually somewhat helpful, and based on that comment, I made some changes to my blogging.

2. Realize that sometimes people have no filter.  Not everyone who makes an ill-advised comment is mean-spirited.  I try to give others the benefit of the doubt and assume that they are just putting their harmless opinions out there and really aren’t considering how it may come across to the writer.

3. Realize that sometimes people are just mean. Unfortunately, sometimes it’s just as simple as that. The fact that a site like GOMI even exists proves that. So when I see comments that I truly believe are in this spirit, they are deleted without a response. #trolls

4. Take a step back.  This is probably the greatest advice I can give on blogging.  I am a redhead through and through and am quick to get angry. As my husband says, I’m fiery and stubborn.  It’s a character flaw that I’ve been working on my entire life.  When I read a rude comment or a snarky caption, my natural and immediate response is to reply back with something equally as hurtful.  But I’ve learned that that’s not the way to handle it, and I’m proud to say I haven’t done that since about my first month of blogging.  If I do respond at all, it is usually after several hours, or sometimes even days, of careful consideration. Take a break, get some ice cream, watch some Bob’s Burgers, and then revisit it.  (Oh, and NEVER respond to comments after you’ve been drinking. This is a no-no!)

The truth is that blogging has opened up a part of me that I really never even knew existed. It has become a true passion of mine and I appreciate each and every one of you who reads the blog.  I appreciate your words of encouragement, but I also appreciate your opinions.  So keep ’em coming!